Special Mommy Moments

I just saw a post on FB from a friend.  She is holding her very special daughter and they both look like there is nothing in the world wrong with anyone or anything.  Those are the moments that we need to cherish as parents.  They come to far apart and not nearly enough in numbers.  Kids grow up so fast and they become so independent that they think if they let us hug or hold them it will rob their futures of all the freedom they have struggled to find.  This is the case with my girls.

One has Autism (high functioning) and has always resisted being touched since she kicked her twin sister out four weeks early.  In all of the pictures of them as infants, if her sister is touching her she is screaming.  When she was safe in her own bassinet or carrier she had the cutest little crooked grin (from the NICU).  I still remember when I was told that she had some symptoms that were "Asperger like" and I started doing some reading on the subject.  Once I stopped trying to get her to hug me she was able to show her affection on her terms.  One day walking to the house from the bus stop she reached up and held my hand, no prompting from me.  That will always be a day I remember.

One of my girls is considered normal, whatever that is, and has her moments of wanting to be close.  However most of the time she is that teenage (13) "don't touch me or look at me because it hurts to be reminded that you are still her" phase of her development.  There is one situation that she can't seem to get close enough though and that is in church.  When we are sitting in the pew, yes the hard wooden ones with a little thin pad on it for looks, she practically climbs in to my lap.  This would be great except that she is as tall as I am and I do a lot of shifting because of my bad hips and tailbone.  It hurts to push her back over to her spot knowing that once they say the final prayer she is off limits for another week.

They do have their moments that I would not miss for anything.  Along with that comes those times where they have to learn lessens that are usually not pleasant for either of us.  After 13 years of dealing with both of them in their own special ways, I don't know what I would do without either one of them.